I'm not entirely satisfied, but I threw it together quickly just to get rid of that ass-hat snowman. I might have some things to change, but I'm also pretty lazy and stupid right now so we all might have to live with it for one month.
Oh, and I know that my guestbook isn't working because I haven't paid the $1.99 that they want nowadays. I just don't have that kind of cash lyring around so don't pressure me about it! (Actually, I just can't remember my paypal password to pay for the damn thing.)
Posted by Taylor on April 07, 2005 @ 5:38 pmReally nothing major, I promise. Granted, the FIERY and IMMEASURABLE pain I've been in for almost 2 weeks has been tiresome, but it's waning. Today, for the first time, I can say that it�s waning. Which makes me want to dance. But not too much, as I do not want to relapse into more FIERY and IMMEASURABLE pain.
I was actually more worried about the procedure itself. I thought that the recovery was going to be simple. Lo and behold, the worst part about the actual day of the surgery was being carted around the hospital with a bright red bracelet on my wrist that read LACTOSE. It was, of course, to warn of my only real allergy, but turned out to be the absolute bane of my existence that day. �Better get that milk out of his IV!� one nurse joked. �Don�t slip him any cheese while he�s under the anesthesia!� another added. Ha. Ha. Ha. To add insult to injury, my bed in the pre-op holding area was positioned right next to the nurse�s station. Just before I actually went in for my surgery the nurses gathered to talk about their favorite desserts. Ice cream, chocolate mousse, tiramisu. The list went on. At one point I actually yelled, �Stoppit! I haven�t eaten in 14 hours!� and one male nurse that I called Big Gay Nurse (never to his face, of course. Unless I slipped as I was coming out from the anesthesia.) poked his head around the corner and said something like, �Shush you! You�re lactose intolerant! You shouldn�t eat these things anyway!� I smiled and nodded because I knew that I�d be in La La Land in just a few short minutes, but I wanted to say, �I shouldn�t eat your heart out of your chest right now either, but if you were any closer that wouldn�t stop me.�
Now, here I am, in FIERY and IMMEASURABLE pain, unable to take my pain meds because they ended up exacerbating the FIERY and IMMEASURABLE pain, just waiting till I can get my ass out of this house.
The only person who might be in more pain than me is The Boss Lady. I�ve made her endure the agony of The Bathroom Bombardier and Mouth all by herself for two full weeks. She�s a saint, I tell you. A real, honest-to-goodness saint.
I do! I do have a lot to say! I'm on a sort of medical leave, though. Well, not a "sort of" medical leave. I am on medical leave. I will be sure to say all that I have to as soon as possible, though.
Also, I need to get rid of the snowman. That's also in the works. If I could concentrate for more than 12 seconds at a time that might get finished sooner than later.
Posted by Taylor on April 03, 2005 @ 3:50 pmJust because we're seeing eachother for the first time since I moved out of his house in December doesn't mean we can't have a nice, normal time together. Just because we've grown apart and together and apart and together and apart and together doesn't mean we can't be together without being together. I can enjoy my time with him and not want more. I can leave that city knowing that, because of him and in spite of him, I've done the right things.
I can't wait to see him, though. I can't wait to talk to him about not getting into school. I can't wait to tell him about my job and the people I've met here. I can't wait to tell him that I'm doing just fine without him. I can't wait to show him that I'm doing just fine without him. And I want him to show me the same,too. I want to see how well he's doing and all the personal strides he's made. I want to see that he's working on himself. I want him to see that I'm proud of him for making those strides.
After my trip in January, I promised myself that I would not go back to the city any time soon. It's amazing how much progress I've made since then. I've managed to rid myself of so many residual feelings in only a couple months. Whether or not I'm 100% ready to actually see him right now is absolutely up for debate, but at least I know I'm ready to be back in the city again.
Posted by Taylor on March 24, 2005 @ 3:38 pm